Dream interpreter says:

Beer: Social relaxation; social acceptance - 'with a glass in my hand I'm one of the lads'; mood change; sedative to drown loneliness or emotional pain.

Yes, i dreamt of beer last night. I duno why, i actually believe in this dream interpreter thingy. Because sometimes they actually are right. Like that time i dreamt of 'ahems' and i asked lizzie to go check it out for me and it said 'a change in your life' and there definitely was a change in my life. Weiirrrdd.

I got sick of being at home yesterday so i went for a walk. I didn't know where I was headed. My legs just kept walking and then they started running. And guess where i ended up? The secret playground. You know, the one where me and dom used to go. Yeaaah. I was crying. HAHA. I stayed up there for awhile then i decided to walk back. There was this big feeling of emptiness in me. My grades are starting to pick up again, i have the greatest friends in the world...i should be happy right? But why do i feel like something's missing? RAAAAH, fuckit. I'll be better one day, i know.

Kevin said: You're in denial about your feelings. I think he's right. I have horrible mood swings. There's times when i feel so happy, and then the next second i just lose it. I like taking long showers now, it helps me think. I feel like going back to the playground. It feels like home. It's super deserted and its basically the only place im alone. But the one thing that's wrong with it is that it brings back too many memories. I keep thinking about that first time when i said 'i love you.' It was the first time i actually said that. RAAAAAAH!

Lizzie, i know you're thinking 'why your blog so emo depressed?' HAHA. One day, i promise, one day it'll be filled with sunshine. (:

I'll try to be strong.
Believe me,I'm trying to move on
It's complicated but understand me.

'Cause I, need time,
My heart is numb has no feeling,
So while I'm still healing,
Just try, and have a little patience.

Cause the scars run so deep,
It's been hard,
But I have to believe.

I saw this poster on the wall of my tuition class.
It said : It doesn't matter how long the road is,
So long as you keep on driving.

Inspirational.